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Any time they spent together was liable at some point to rise into disagreements over almost any topic, from politics to housework.And yet, they sought each other like rain to parched earth. Their relationship was like a gravitational force, drawing them together to drink deeply of each other. It was as if they had to explore everything, nothing had bars, nothing could be held back. It created an unusual dynamic for each of them, to test their own limitations, both good and bad. Their relationship was fiery, tempestuous, and easily ignited into arguments that eventually melted into a cauterising, healing passion, which they could neither deny nor escape. They knew that while they were angry they couldn't see that they were at the same place but with different ways of achieving their viewpoints. Their opposing thought patterns were consistent in their inconsistencies. What they did know was that they wound up with intense and insatiable longings for each other. So close, they couldn't. “Yes” answered Hugh, “I need some toilet paper for my anus.” “Ok,” replied Phil, “What kind of anus are we talkin’ here?” “Well, it’s a 1983 half Italian, Quarter French, seven thirty seconds Norwegian and one thirty second native American anus.” “Oh, interesting” said Phil. “Is this a huge anus we’re talking about here?” “Well I’m Hugh Jainus,” replied a slightly flustered Hugh Jainus. “But I don’t have a huge anus. It’s just average.” “Well then, I suggest a aloe lotion three ply all natural recycled unscented roll for you average sized 1983 half Italian, Quarter French, seven thirty seconds Norwegian and one thirty second native American anus.” offered a confident Phil. “I think you’ll find it a satisfactory paper for you anus.” “Is that a good paper for an occasional hog slapper?” Inquired Hugh. “I sometimes think about a woman playing a trombone while wearing a top hat and a form fitting black stretch fit halter mini.
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